Thanks to pop culture, women think that having a body like 175cm, 54kg Heidi Klum is the answer to a sizzling and sexy relationship. When Reader’s Digest asked women when they feel sexiest, they said it was when they weighed less than they do now. In fact, 80% said that losing weight would improve their sex life.
Men showed their own insecurities. A whopping 70% thought a slimmer waistline would lead to better sex, and 42% said they would go shirtless only in front of their partner.
But here’s the big surprise. Despite idealised images, men don’t really expect (or even want) their own wives or girlfriends to be supermodel-thin. And women aren’t looking for Brad Pitt in their beds. Yes, overweight people are having good sex. They know what researchers and scientists are beginning to uncover: a great sexual
experience comes mostly from our minds, not from perfectly proportioned bodies.
Extra kilos can be sexy
Overweight adults are not only having lots of sex – they are also getting extreme enjoyment out of it, says US researcher Martin Binks, director of behavioural health at the Diet and Fitness Centre at Duke University, North Carolina. Binks’s study subjects are trying to lose weight and probably should, for health reasons. But what’s remarkable is that the biggest improvement in their sex lives came when they had lost just 10% of their body weight.
What’s more, having meaningful sex induces the release of the hormone oxytocin. “It makes a person feel love and empathy,” says heart surgeon Mehmet Oz, co-author of the You series of health books. “Meaningful sex can also lower blood pressure,” he
continues, “and it tells the gut not to send signals to the brain to eat.”
The bottom line: a healthy sex drive can lead to weight loss.
Men worry, too
Women aren’t the only ones who are misguided about weight and sex. “Men are increasingly dissatisfied with their bodies,” says British psychologist Dr Viren Swami of the University of Westminster, author of The Missing Arms of Venus De Milo: Reflections on the Science of Attractiveness. “Some men want to be thinner,” he says, “but most want to be more muscular.”
